


No White Flags

by dnitegirl



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Humanstuck, Mention of Character Death, Multi, Political AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-05
Updated: 2013-07-05
Packaged: 2017-12-17 18:15:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/870514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dnitegirl/pseuds/dnitegirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He would get her elected even if he had to face the whole of New York City, a controlling family, or the wrath of an angry ex. Losing was not an option.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No White Flags

 

What the fuck did these people know? Eridan could not believe the nerve of it. Seriously, what kind of headline was “Mayor’s Daughter: Shame to the Family Name.”

He took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself. Even so, it wasn’t long before he was balling up the offending paper and throwing it at the wall. To stop himself from taking out his frustration on something a bit more valuable, he laid his head face down on his desk, blindly reaching for the stress ball Fef had given him for his last birthday.

Fef only officially announced her candidacy under the Democratic Party yesterday, and already those fucking journalists were attacking her. The fact that so much attention was being given to a city council primary was ridiculous. Apparently, that was just what happened when the daughter of the mayor of New York City took a stand against her own mother.

Eridan sighed. This was going to be a long election.

He had taken it upon himself to be Feferi’s campaign manager, and Eridan would stop at nothing to get his girlfriend of five years elected. It was going to be difficult, of course. They were just out of college and this was Feferi’s first step into politics. Though, having a law degree from Harvard and being from a family heavily involved in the city meant she had a fighting chance.

Feferi was exactly what this city needed. She was a kind young woman who always put the people before herself. An idealistic thinker, she sought to make sure everyone was equal. Eridan may not have agreed with Feferi’s positions on everything, but she was sure as hell better than her dictator of a mother.

It was a well-known fact that Candice Peixes was perhaps one of the most corrupt politicians that New York had ever seen. She had the majority of the city council in her pocket and could easily get the journalists to write whatever she told them. The quality of life for the poor shrank with every new bill passed, while the wealthy reaped the benefits. It was obvious that Mayor Peixes had a hand in the elections, or else she would have been voted out long ago.

After a few more squeezes to the stress ball combined with a calming breathing exercise Fef had taught him, Eridan felt he was ready to take action against the article.

He pushed back from his office desk and stood up. Before leaving the room, he stopped to grab the crumpled paper. With paper in hand, Eridan headed into the chaos that was the rest of the campaign headquarters.

"Everyone! Group meeting." Eridan shouted as he headed towards the conference room. Much to his irritation, he noticed he was the only one moving. "Now," he growled. All of a sudden, each employee was rising from their cubicle and piling into the room after him. Eridan wasn't exactly well liked or respected, but everyone knew that he could get the job done. He had an undergraduate degree in government and a graduate degree in business [both from Harvard] so it was at least understood amongst the staff that Eridan Ampora knew what he was doing.

"What are we gathered here for, oh great and powerful leader?" Karkat, their tech specialist, grumbled as he took a seat at the long table.

"Cut the sass, Kar." Eridan bit back. Then he addressed the rest of the crew. "Did anyone actually bother readin’ the headlines today?"

The only answer he got was from Terezi, the team’s legal analyst. "Well, I would have if, you know... I could read the paper."

Eridan rolled his eyes. "We all know you’re blind, but I wasn't talkin’ to you."

Still, no-one else spoke up. The ‘expert’ team Eridan had assembled with his wide range of connections, and not a damn word from any of them. The election was clearly theirs to lose. Eridan rubbed his forehead to relieve his building tension. "You’ve got to be kiddin’ me. None of you even keep up with current events?"

A table-wide shake of heads, and Eridan groaned with exasperation.

“You know, Fef is really lucky I gave her the day off for our anniversary so she doesn't have to see exactly how little her own staff cares about her campaign."

"We're sorry, Eridan." Nepeta frowned from near the back of the table. "But reading the papers seems to be more of your job. You know, so you can plan and such! We just know you’re gonna tell us what we need to know, anyways." She smiled from her end of the table. “You’re pretty good at that.”

"Nep, you're in charge of public relations. If it's anyone's job to be readin’ the papers, it's yours. Journalists represent the public, and you need to know what bullshit they’re spewin’ a second after they say it." Eridan countered and Nepeta sank in her seat.

“I’ll do better next time.” Nepeta frowned, clearly embarrassed at being singled out in front of everyone.

Eridan chose to ignore her and instead held up the paper. “Well, since all of you lazy assholes apparently can’t read, I guess I’ll just read it for you all now.”

_“‘Mayor’s Daughter: Shame to the Family Name’: Yesterday, it was announced that Feferi Peixes, daughter of the current Mayor Candice Peixes, would be running in the primaries as she chases a City Council seat. However, it may come as a surprise to learn that this heiress to the Peixes family name is entering under the democratic side of politics. Ms. Peixes is breaking a long established tradition as her mother, grandmother, even her cousin Meenah, current District 1 seat holder, are staunch republicans. Mayor Peixes, when asked, refused to comment on the announcement. We can only guess she is mourning the loss of a daughter.”_

"Well?" Eridan asked, opening up what he had just read for discussion. "Does anyone else see exactly how bad this is?"

Karkat shrugged. "So what? Negative journalism is kind of to be expected when you go against the majority."

"And it shows that the Republican Party fears us if they're making this big of a fuss over a city council race which only helps us in a closed primary." Terezi added helpfully. "Besides, even when we get to the general election - which we obviously will - the Mayor won’t be our opponent. Feferi's cousin Meenah, the current District 1 seat holder, will."

Eridan sighed. "Yeah, whatever. You're makin’ some sense I guess.”

Karkat scoffed. "You're just pissed that they're insulting Feferi."

Flustered by the affront to his leadership, Eridan spat back. "Yeah, well. If someone insulted your girlfriend then you'd probably feel the same way."

Both Karkat and Terezi broke into laughter. When they’d both calmed down enough. Karkat said, "You insult Terezi all the time! You don't see me getting pissed off with everything you say."

Eridan crinkled his nose before stammering "Sh.. shut up!" He only got more laughter in response, which did nothing to raise his mood. No-one ever fucking respected him. Eridan was supposed to be leading them and yet his team would walk right over him. At least things were better when Fef was around.

She deserved the day off though; Fef was practically working herself to death stressing over this campaign. Eridan also didn’t want her stressing out on their anniversary. He’d never let himself live it down if the campaign swallowed their relationship.

Before Eridan could chastise his team for laughing at him, Nepeta spoke up. “Perhaps we should get back to discussing the election?”

He smiled at her gratefully and clapped his hands. He figured he could forgive her for sucking earlier. “Thank you, Nep. Now, about these primaries. Do we know who our opponent is yet?” Eridan did know the answer to his own question (of course). He just needed to make sure his team was at least on top of something.

Fortunately for his team, Nepeta spoke up again. “From what I’ve read, Gamzee Makara is the only other Democratic candidate for District 1.” Eridan noticed Terezi’s jovial mood leave.

Just as Eridan was about to ask her just what her problem was, Karkat yelled, "Wait! Seriously?" He seemed furious.

Eridan turned to him, confused. "What, you know him? Is he someone we should be worryin’ about?" Eridan had never heard of this guy before, and that was saying something - he knew pretty much everyone there was to know in this business.

Terezi held Karkat back, calming him down. Once Karkat had a moment to cool down, he explained. "No-one to worry about. He's just a stoner and a fucking awful person. Went to the same school as Terezi and me. I don’t even think he graduated so the fact he's even trying politics is ridiculous."

Grinning, Eridan said. "Thats what I like to hear. Any idea on his stances yet?"

Nepeta looked down at a packet of papers. "It seems here that he is campaigning on the idea of legalizing marijuana. Aside from that, he appears to have no set beliefs."

This seemed almost too good to be true. Man, this primary was going be so fucking easy. "Alright then. If something major happens, we'll adapt, but I doubt we're goin’ to have much trouble. For now, we’ll just concentrate on fundraising." Eridan thought for a moment. "Maybe we should start pre-plannin’ for the general election. We already know Meenah is the opponent in that leg and we'll need every advantage we can get on her."

Terezi seemed happy with the change in topic. "You and Feferi know far more about Meenah than any of us would."

“Well, duh.” Eridan rolled his eyes. “But that only means you guys better start learnin’ every fuckin’ tiny detail of her life too.” He reached into a folder and pulled out a list a research team had handed to him, handing it around the table for everyone to look at. “Meenah herself isn’t that dangerous. She’s really only a wannabe Candice. The real threat, as is written on the top of the paper I just gave you, is Vriska Serket, Meenah’s personal campaign manager. You want an example of a despicable person? She’s it. Vris is a cold-hearted bitch that treats politics like a cutthroat, high-stakes game. She knows we’re a threat to her employer’s position so I wouldn’t put it past her to start attackin’ us before the general elections even start.”

Just as Eridan was about to continue his speech, Terezi interrupted. “Everything he just said about Vriska is pretty much true. With a few exaggerations, of course. We grew up together, but on account of her being a manipulative jerk, we haven’t spoken in years.” He inclined his head towards her, as though she’d proved his point. “That being said, Eridan, I think you are being way too paranoid.”

This time, Eridan just waved her away. “Paranoia is a great defense. Now, if I can stop bein’ rudely interrupted by people I’m payin’.” He took his copy of the paper and gestured at every name below Vriska’s. “Everyone else on that list shouldn’t be too much of a worry of ours. Aranea is Vriska’s sister, but all she does is write the speeches her sister tells her to. Tavros has Nep’s job. You may have some trouble competin’ with him cause he’s a fuckin’ cripple, which instantly gains him some sympathy points. Terezi would know all about that, wouldn’t you.”

“I resent you.” Terezi deadpanned which only made Eridan chuckle.

“Tell me somethin’ I don’t know.” Eridan flipped through the list some more, making sure that he didn’t forget anyone. “Their legal person is Latula Pyrope. Any relation, Terezi?”

“Not that I know of, but I have a large family.” She shrugged. “She could be some distant cousin I’ve never heard of.”

“Noted.” He scribbled ‘possible relation to Terezi’ in the margins of the paper. “I suggest you do some lookin’ into your family tree. See if there’s any dirt you can dig up on her.”

Terezi smiled a toothy smile. “Can do, boss.”

“See, all of you guys could benefit with an attitude like Terezi’s” Eridan basked in the feeling that people were actually listening to, and agreeing with, what he was saying for once. Again, he examined the paper. He tried looking under the technical category so he could give Karkat some words of wisdom, but he couldn’t find a name. Rather, beside the words Technical Specialist, the words ‘Position has been filled’ were placed next to it.“I think Vris just hired some random freelance tech guy. She must run through ‘em fast if it doesn’t even bother listin’ a name.”

“I doubt that it’s some amateur.” Karkat said. “Have you seen their website?  It’s like one of the most expertly crafted pages I’ve ever seen.”

Honestly, Eridan didn’t waste time with looking at campaign sites. All they were for was easy propaganda. He just let Karkat deal with all of that shit. “And how does our website compare?” Karkat looked away, embarrassed. “Well, Kar?”

“Uh. Let’s just say ours needs a lot of work.”

Eridan glared at him. “Just how much work?”

“Look, I’m not a web design specialist!” Karkat raised his hands defensively. “Our site is functional. I’m just not so great on the whole design part of it. Plus, you only gave me, what, a couple of hours to throw something together?” When Eridan seemed unamused, Karkat just sighed. “Ugh, fine. Give me a couple of days and I’ll have a better layout.”

Eridan nodded. “You’d better get started as soon as possible. I want it up by tomorrow.”

“That’s…!” Karkat tried to protest, but a serious look from Eridan cut him off. “Whatever, asshole.”

“On that note, good job, team. We don’t completely suck.” Eridan began packing his bag up hurriedly. “Meeting adjourned. Everyone get to work on whatever you feel necessary.” He turned to Karkat and raised a warning eyebrow. “Kar, that website had better make everyone who happens across it cry tears of joy.”

Eridan was pushing open the conference room door before everyone even had a chance to get up from their chairs. As he left, he glanced at his watch and groaned. It was already four o’clock. He only had three hours to get back to his apartment, get ready, and pick up Fef.

While to every normal person that might seem like plenty of time, Eridan needed at least a couple of hours to go through his very meticulous grooming process for a formal occasion. The fact that he insisted on driving everywhere in the least car-friendly city in the country just meant that it would take over half an hour to even reach his apartment, let alone pick up Fef and get to the restaurant.

“Where are you off to in such a hurry?” Terezi questioned.

“I’ve got a very important date tonight that I need to get ready for.” Eridan called as he headed to his office.

“He and Feferi have a very romantic night planned.” Nepeta explained with a huge smile on her face. She better be happy. After all, she helped organize it.

Terezi nodded. Behind him, everyone (hopefully) returned to their posts.

Eridan did a quick check of his office, making sure that he wasn’t forgetting anything important. He inspected the contents of his briefcase, triple-checking to make sure all the files he’d planned on working on at home were there. His wallet, the most important item, was safely tucked away in his pants pocket, right next to his phone. However, it took him a good five minutes to shuffle through his desk before he located them under a mess of papers. What a fucking waste of time.

Keys gripped tightly in hand, Eridan headed for the elevator. Pressing the button, he waited for the elevator in the busy office building to come down to him. He could only stare at the floor numbers constantly move up and down. Predictably enough, it took yet another five minutes until the elevator dinged on floor 11. All he could do in the meantime was tap is foot impatienty.

Eridan was just about to step into the elevator when he heard a distressed cry from behind him.

“MOTHERFUCKING HELL! SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?”

Eridan gritted his teeth, counted to three, and practiced those breathing exercises Fef taught him. As much of a hurry he was in, he still couldn’t outright ignore an outburst like that coming from Karkat. Begrudgingly, he stepped away from the elevator and headed back towards Karkat’s desk. Whatever it was, it better have been fucking worth it.

He really couldn’t believe what he was seeing in front of Karkat. On his desktop screen was a single image that covered everything up. It was a deep orange picture of an atomic bomb going off. Even more disturbing were the words that flashed on the screen.

“THE ARMAGEDDONS ARE UPON YOU”

“I just opened up our website. I was looking up its code to fix a few things like you told me to, and that shit just popped up. I can’t close it. Fuck, I can’t even access anything on this piece of shit computer!” Karkat looked like he was having a heart attack.

Eridan was just about to just tell him to restart the computer or something when about 4 other people came came up to Karkat demanding to know what was happening to each of their computers.

He didn’t even have to look to know that every damn computer had the exact same thing on its screen.

“Everyone just go sit down for now. We’re handlin’ it as we speak.” Honestly, Eridan was at a loss at what to do and the crowd that had started forming around them wasn’t helping at all. “Any idea what the fuck we’re lookin at here?” He asked, giving Karkat his full attention.

“The only thing I can guess is that someone used our website as a trigger for a network hack.” Eridan had to give Karkat some credit. Even though he was freaking out, Karkat could still think constructively about the problem at hand. “This is really advanced work. Like I have a basic knowledge of how shit like this runs, but this is going to be fucking difficult.”

“Can you fix it?”

“Yeah. It’ll take a while though. I’m going to have to reset the entire network first, which will take at least the rest of the day. Come tomorrow, we’ll get to see how much damage it actually did. I can’t confidently say how long it will take for things to get back to normal after we know that.”

Eridan sighed as he took all this information in. “Fuckin’ hell. We cannot afford a setback this early in the game.”

“I swear, I downloaded all kinds of protection against this sort of shit and they still got past all those firewalls.” Karkat ran his hands down his face in frustration. “Why the hell would someone go through all the effort to hack into a city council primary campaign?”

“To scare us. Some sick fuck is hopin’ that we’ll drop out.” Eridan sighed. “There’s no way we’re fallin’ for it though. It’s just like Terezi said earlier. Only reason they’re tryin’ to scare us is cause they’re terrified.”

“So its one of our opponents doing this? Couldn’t they be disqualified for pulling shit like this?”

“Without a doubt. ” Eridan said confidently. “In fact, I’d bet this is why Vris didn’t have her tech guy listed. Probably contacted some infamous foreign hacker to sneak into our stuff. They want the anonymity and she just wants to fuck us over. As to your other question, do you even know a single thing about politics? It’s all about breakin’ the rules and tryin’ to avoid bein’ caught at it.”

Karkat seemed unconvinced. “That seems kind of farfetched.”

“Look, if all politicians played by the rules, do you think people like Candice would still be in power?” Eridan raised an eyebrow at him, folding his arms.

“Point taken.”

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m kind of in a hurry.” Eridan was tired of all these fucking interruptions. It seemed as though the universe was out to get him today. All he wanted to do was have a nice meal and go home with the love of his life. Was that too much to ask for?

Fortunately, everything had started to calm down so he was now able to leave for the parking garage with little trouble. Once in the car, he turned on some soothing music to distract him as he endured the thirty minutes he knew he would have to spend in the Manhattan traffic to get home. He had been hoping to avoid the 4:30 rush hour, but the earlier delay had placed him right in the middle of it.

He had wasted far too long dealing with the computer issues so he was feeling stressed for time. At least both his apartment and the office were in the financial district in Manhattan. However, the apartment was close to the East River while the office was more in the middle of the district.

When he drove into the parking garage of his apartment complex, he took a quick look at the clock. Already 5:05.

Well, he wouldn’t have time to take a shower. The shower combined with the time he’d have to spend working on his hair afterwards would definitely make him late.

He rode the elevator up to his apartment, watching the numbers flick from one to eleven - his floor.

Eridan headed past the living area, laying his briefcase on the coffee table as he passed by. On his way to his bedroom, he nearly tripped over a box that had somehow ended up in his path. God, his place was a mess. He and Fef had agreed that after the election was over, he would start moving over to her place. As soon as they’d made that plan, Eridan had immediately gone out and gotten a bunch of boxes so he could get a head start on packing.

Feferi was afraid of rushing into anything, which Eridan understood completely, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. Originally he had wanted to move in with her the moment they’d left Harvard. After all, they’d both been moving back to New York. And yet, Fef had been afraid that they were moving too fast. Which was a legitimate concern, of course. Privately, Eridan still thought it didn’t mean that they should have to get places in separate complexes.

Eridan sighed as he headed to his closet. He really shouldn’t have been complaining, even in his head. After all, he got to be in an honest-to-god relationship with the girl he had been in love with since he was in middle school. Fef did’t even know he existed until college, despite their families living right next to each other. The young him was just too nervous to say a word to her. Yet, when he found out they were both Harvard bound, he found the courage to at least say hi. Their first two years of school, they had been the best of friends and slowly became inseparable. Starting their junior year, they had started dating, much to the surprise of Eridan. Ever since she agreed to the date with him, they had been nothing but happy for the past five years.

He shifted through the contents of his closet, pulling out his bespoke designer suit. Quickly stripping out of his smelly and wrinkled work clothes, he donned the formal attire. To top off the suit, Eridan snagged a pale purple scarf and tucked it into his vest.

A quick look in the mirror told him his clothes looked quite dashing, but his hair was a mess. A dab of gel combined with some expert comb work later, and everything was in order. He did everything from shaving to plucking his eyebrows. After a dash of cologne and a quick rinse with mouthwash, he deemed himself ready and glanced at the clock, daring to hope that he’d made the time.

Fuck, it was already 5:50.

Not sparing another second, he grabbed Fef's gift as well as some flowers he had picked up the previous day and sped down to his car. Being in the hurry he was, he drove recklessly. Hell, it was a miracle he even made it to the Ocean apartment complex in one piece.

He picked up Fef’s flowers, leaving her gift in the back seat. Passing through the ornate lobby, he made it to the elevator, pushing the button to take him to the 23rd floor.

Once he arrived at her door, he gave a nervous knock. It took a moment, but soon it swung open to reveal Feferi Peixes. His jaw dropped as he looked at her, clad in a long, pale pink dress that shimmered with gold.

"You’re... Um... Absolutely breathtakin’."  He stammered nervously, holding out the flowers with a shaking hand. "Thought you might like these."

Fef accepted them, a warm smile on her face. “And you are quite handsome yourself.”

“Really? I actually feel kinda scruffy next to you. I woulda’ taken more time to get ready but I was a little rushed.”

She pressed her nose into the bouquet and giggled. “You look fine, silly.” She playfully swatted him. “How were you rushed? Knowing you, you probably gave yourself all day to prepare.”

Eridan rolled his eyes at the accurate guess. “Somethin’ came up at work right as I was headin’ for home.”

When he mentioned work, Fef’s peppiness faded a little. “What happened?”

“Just some computer trouble. Nothin’ to worry about.” Which was a complete lie. Eridan was still freaking out over the hacker’s meddling. To reassure her, he placed a soft hand on her cheek. “Let’s not bog down the night with talk about business or politics, ok?” When she nodded, he leaned in for a kiss. She easily pulled him in closer with the arm not occupied with the flowers.

Eventually, they pulled away, both of them looking at the other as if they were the most important person in the world. “Happy anniversary, Eridan.”

“Happy anniversary, Fef.” He placed another gentle kiss on her cheek before adding; “So, we should probably get goin’ if we wanna make it in time for the reservation.”

“Of course! Just let me put these in a vase and I’ll be right out.” She ran inside her apartment, leaving Eridan to stand in the doorway. It was only a couple of minutes before Fef was walking back to him, a gift  bag in hand. “I know we decided we didn’t have to get gifts for each other, but I couldn’t help myself.”

Eridan chuckled. “Don’t worry about it. Yours is waiting in the car.” He held out his arm for her to take. “Shall we, madam?” They linked arms and headed down the hallway, perfectly in step.

It only took a few minutes for the pair to reach the parking lot, and they separated to get into their respective seats - Eridan behind the wheel, and Feferi in the passenger seat.

"We can just exchange gifts when we get to dinner." Eridan turned on the ignition, feeling the engine roar to life.

Fef agreed and placed her gift beside her feet. “So where are you taking us?”

“A little place called Per Se.”

Fef was shocked. “Per Se? But I’ve heard it’s nearly impossible to get a reservation there!”

Chuckling, Eridan explained, “Not when you call a month in advance and drop the name Peixes.” He heard her groan from the backseat. “What?”

“Eridan, you know I’m trying to distance myself from my mother’s name.” Great. Now he disappointed her.

“It’s your name too.” When they came to their first red light, he turned to face her. “We’re not runnin’ away from it. We’re gunna change what everyone thinks of it.”

“If you say so.” He could tell she was disappointed. They had been over this same topic a hundred times and he knew she wanted to have nothing to do with the rest of her family. She had been fighting the cold-hearted stereotype that came with being a Peixes for her whole life.

“Fef, everyone is goin’ to love you. You are the sweetest girl I know. You’re passionate. You’re, well... you’re perfect. Basically you’re everything your mom isn’t.” The light turned green and he kept driving, turning back to the road.

“Now you’re just flattering me.”

Eridan smiled, happy he could improve her mood. “Ain’t flattery if it’s true.”

She giggled and their conversation dissolved into absent chatter as he drove. The trip to the restaurant was longer than the drive from work to his apartment and traffic wasn't any better, but the time just flew by when Fef was with him. Even though he was in a hurry, his stress from earlier was gone.

They pulled up right next to the restaurant where a valet came up and asked him if he would like his car parked for him. Eridan nodded without a second thought. The thirty-five dollars it would cost was cheaper than the inevitable anguish of finding a parking space. He handed over his keys and got out of the car. Fef moved to his side, both gifts in her hands as they walked inside the fine establishment.

The hostess didn’t even have to ask for their name. She instantly recognized Feferi as she and Eridan approached the hostess station. “Miss Peixes!” The hostess called out - a bit unprofessionally - as she tried to get Feferi’s attention. “Just in time. We’ve just finished preparing your table.”

Because of her mother, Feferi had become quite a famous face in New York. Candice had been mayor for nearly the last twelve years so the public had paid quite a lot of attention to her family. She was just as recognizable as any celebrity to walk though those doors.

“Wonderful!” Eridan stated cheerfully as they were led to a private table in the corner. He had specifically requested a table in such an intimate location. After having Fef accosted in public so many times, one had to learn to take precautions.

Before the hostess let them be, she nervously said, “I just wanted to let you know how happy I was yesterday to hear you were running for City Council. You’re a much needed change and you already have my vote.”

Fef gave a bashful smile, obviously trying to hold in her excitement at hearing the compliment. However, the fact the hostess hadn’t left them alone was beginning to piss Eridan off. Before she could say anything else, Eridan stepped in. “Thank you so much for your kind words.” He gave a seemingly polite smile that was an obvious sneer to anyone that actually knew Eridan. “But if you could please excuse us for now. We’re celebrating our anniversary, if you don’t mind.”

The hostess realized her blunder. “Oh! I apologize. Your waiter will be right with you.” She walked off, head down and face red with embarrassment.

Now that she was out of the way, Eridan turned back to face Fef. “Geez, I never thought she’d leave.”

Fef, to his surprise, looked unamused. “You didn’t have to be so rude to her.”

“Excuse me. She was the one bein’ rude.” Eridan scoffed.

“She was being nice,” Fef countered. “You and I both know every vote counts. It’s so refreshing to hear that people are already on our side.”

He saw the waiter coming so he figured he should just end this unnecessary discussion. “Whatever you say, Fef.” He knew she wasn’t happy with it, but it wasn’t the time or place to argue.

A young man came up to the table and handed them each a menu. While he was calmer than the hostess, he still seemed quite overjoyed to serve the Mayor’s daughter. “Welcome to Per Se, Miss Peixes. It is quite the pleasure to have you here tonight. If I may ask, what is the occasion?”

Eridan glared at the man and was about to give him a similar reply to the one he gave the hostess, but Fef spoke before him. “It’s our anniversary.” She said pleasantly.

“Well thank you for spending it with us here at Per Se.” He clapped his hands softly to show he was ready to do business. “Can I get you started with a bottle of wine? We have a beautifully aged Ampora red wine. It comes from a famous local winery from right outside the city.”

“Yes, I know." Eridan stated, clearly uninterested. "My father owns the winery.” It was true. The Ampora winery had had been in the family since colonial times. The family wealth stemmed from an odd combination of owning one of the finest and oldest wineries in America and controlling a huge shipping and distribution empire. Sufficed to say, their wines were quite famous internationally. “I think we’ll have a bottle of Chardonnay instead.”

The waiter seemed shocked that Eridan was the heir to their number one local supplier, but rather than ask about it, he simply complied and said he would be back soon with their appetizer and wine.

When they were alone finally, Fef simply giggled. “Well, that was better, but I still feel like you could work on your delivery a bit.”

Eridan smirked and disregarded her words. “I’m not the one that has to deal with people nicely the next couple of months. I’ve gotta be as stern and rude as possible to get everyone doin’ what they’re supposed to do.”

“I feel you would be able to get so much more out of people if you just showed them a little kindness.”

Eridan chuckled. “I have my ways and you have yours, princess.”

Fef smiled brightly at the nickname. “I know. And that’s why we work so well together!”

“Ain’t that the truth.” Eridan and Feferi were pretty much polar opposites, but despite that, they had managed to keep their relationship healthy and thriving for the past five years. “So, you wanna hear some juicy gossip I overheard?”

“You know how much I hate gossip.” Fef frowned.

“Well it’s not really gossip so much as it is Kar bein’ stupid.”

Fef sighed, knowing that she was going to have to hear it regardless of what she thought. “What is it?”

“Kar keeps tryin’ to hook up Kankri with this one chick.” Eridan grinned slyly.

Fef was confused. “How is that a bad thing? Karkat cares a lot about his cousin, and if Kankri could move on from, well... you know, then good for him.”

Eridan frowned at her. “You and I both know that Kan could never move on from him and he shouldn't have to. It’s been twelve years and he’s just fine being single.” The topic was getting a bit heavy from what Eridan had intended it to be. He just wanted to poke some fun at Karkat, not to open that can of worms. “Besides, Kan is most definitely gay, despite what Kar thinks. And I’m pretty sure this woman Kar is talkin’ about is a huge lesbian. So, in conclusion, Kar is just bein a fuckin’ idiot.”

“I guess.” Fef grumbled. “Playing matchmaker is never a good idea.”

“I wouldn’t go that far. It can actually be pretty enjoyable. Kar’s just goin’ about it the wrong way with the wrong people.”

Fef shook her head, “Back in high-school, I tried something similar with my two best friends. It didn’t exactly work out so well.”

“I didn’t know you tried something like that.” Eridan mused. It did sound like something Fef would do though; she always wanted everyone around her to be happy. “Why didn’t it work out between them?”

She blushed. “It didn’t help that the boy was in love with me. It made my attempt seem really ridiculous. When I found out, I was so embarrassed.”

Eridan could tell Fef was getting upset but he was curious about this now. “Did you let him down easy at least?”

Fef took a deep breath. “Actually, he was the same person I was dating until junior year of high school. Sophomore year he asked me out, and that’s how I found out just how silly I had been.”

It took Eridan a couple of moments for that to sink in. Fef only had one ex, one that she dated all throughout high school, until the end of junior year. He only knew a few things about this ex, the first being that Feferi was completely and totally in love with him. He was a genius that came from a lower class family and apparently had a bit of a lisp. The second of which being that said fucker fell off the face of the planet after taking Fef’s virginity. This resulted in Fef having severe trust issues for the first several months of Eridan knowing her.

Personally, Eridan never met the guy. Hell, he hadn’t even seen a picture of him, but the way Fef talked about him, Eridan just knew that asshole had stolen Fef’s heart a long time ago and crushed it.

Eridan was about to reach over and comfort her, when the waiter came over with the wine and appetizer and rudely interrupted him. He thought about giving the waiter shit for it, but he decided it wasn’t worth Fef’s disappointment. The waiter placed a small dish of oysters in front of them and Eridan could only hope that the food would serve as a distraction. He opened the bottle of Chardonnay before filling each of their glasses. “Enjoy your first course. I can go ahead and take your entrée order if you would like.”

Considering there were only two choices, Eridan figured they might as well cut some of the time between this and the next course. “I think I’ll have the Aged American Wagyu.”

“You are aware that the meal comes with a $65 supplemental fee.”

Eridan had to fight the instinct to roll his eyes. Of course he knew it cost a shit-ton extra, but he didn’t come to the second most expensive restaurant in New York City to eat cheaply. “Yes, I am well aware.”

“As long as you know.” The waiter turned to face Fef. “How about yourself?”

Eridan could tell Fef was struggling with the menu. That was the problem with these fancier places - no-one actually understood anything on the menu except for a few words. “I guess I’ll have the Poached Blue Lobster.”

“Alright then.” He said as he wrote her order down. “Your entrees should be out shortly.” The waiter returned to the kitchen.

They made quick work of the appetizer, both extremely pleased with the taste. When both had finished the small platter, Eridan leaned forward and gently took Feferi’s hand in his own. He lightly lifted it and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “I want to see you open your present now.”

Feferi tucked a lock of hair behind her ear to cover her shyness at the sweet gesture. “Sure. Just let me get it.” Eridan risked another kiss to her hand before letting it go. He couldn’t help himself. He just had this constant urge to shower Fef in what he knew to be sappy gestures of affection. He knew she didn’t mind them. She was just uncomfortable with public expression. It made sense after all, considering how her public life was constantly on view for everyone to criticize. She leaned to the side so she could pick up her bag. Not only did she remove Eridan’s present to her, but also her gift to Eridan. She handed the little tissue filled gift bag across the table. “You have to open that after I finish opening yours.”

“Ok, ok.” Eridan took the bag, holding onto it tightly as he concentrated on the box in Fef’s hand.

She carefully peeled off the wrapping paper, too afraid of making a mess in this restaurant. Paper gone and shoved into her bag to be thrown away later, she lifted the lid to the black box. “Oh my god Eridan, they’re beautiful!”

Eridan smiled. In the box lay two sparkling aquamarine earrings. “If you look closely, you’ll notice, they’re actually cut in the shape of cuttlefish.” Eridan found an expert jewel crafter in his hunt to find an anniversary gift and had a pair of custom earrings crafted just for Fef. They were very expensive, but seeing that smile huge on her face as she started putting them on made every penny of it worth his while.

“Well, how do I look?” She asked, once she’d finished putting them on.

“Like the most beautiful person I’ve ever had the luck to look at.”  Eridan said, captivated. They were only earrings, but they made her so happy. He already had bought a matching ring, but that was for another day. Too much was happening at once lately, and he didn’t want to make Fef go through any extra stress.

“You’re being sappy again,” Fef teased.

Eridan rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Tryin’ to give my girlfriend a compliment and all she does is complain.” He teased back.

“Now you’re just being silly.” She reached over and poked him. “It’s time for you to open your gift.”

Eridan smiled. Just as he was about to pull the tissue paper from the bag, the waiter again decided to interrupt them. Their appetizer plates were removed from in front of them and replaced with considerably larger dishes. “Your poached lobster, and your Wagyu beef. Enjoy.”

“Thank you.” Fef said before Eridan could make a rude remark.

With the waiter gone, the two began eating.

“Oh my god, Eridan, this is delicious!” Fef exclaimed after her first bite.

“Mind if I have a taste?”

“Of course. Hold on.” Feferi cut a bit of the lobster off and picked it up with a fork. “Open up.” She giggled as she held the fork out in front of her, gesturing for Eridan to get it.

“Fef, are you really doing this?” Eridan playfully rolled his eyes before just grabbing the lobster with his teeth. At least it amused her, or else there would be no way in hell he’d do this. He chewed and swallowed it, letting the rich taste of the pricey shellfish overcome him. “Mmmm, that is good. I’d offer you some of mine, but I know it goes against your diet.” Feferi was a pescetarian, meaning the only meat she would eat was fish.

“It does look delicious, but no thank you.” She shook her head. “I appreciate the offer though.”

For the next moment, they just sat in quiet bliss, each taking their time to eat the meal in front of them. Eridan had to prevent himself from making some obscene sounds, but that was a hard task when one was enjoying the most quality steak possible. On the other end of the table, Fef looked like she was suffering a similar conundrum.

Before they knew it, they were finished with their plates and already the waiter was carrying out two more small dishes to them. Eridan and Feferi barely had a chance to lay down their forks from the entrée when the waiter was already moving the plates out of the way. “How was the food?”

“Extraordinary.” Eridan said as the waiter picked up the empty plates.

“Excellent.” He sat a crème brulee in front of each of them. “I will be out with your check soon. I hope you’ve had a lovely night.”

The dessert was gone faster than it had arrived, almost as if Eridan and Feferi were racing to see who could finish it first. With both bowls set aside, Eridan reached over and threaded his and Fef’s fingers together. “Did you enjoy dinner?”

“It was one of the best I’ve had in my life.” Considering Fef was the mayor’s daughter and had access to basically any place she wanted, that was definitely saying something.

“I’m glad. “ His thumb gently stroked the side of her hand. “I wanted tonight to be special. Not often you can say you’ve been together with someone for half a decade.”

“Has it really been that long? Wow. The time goes by so fast.” She gave him a soft, honest smile. “Five wonderful years.”

“Five wonderful years.” Eridan repeated. They met each other’s gaze and leaned in for a kiss. It was brief, both mindful of the fact they were in public.  When they pulled away, Eridan continued. “And may we have many more ahead of us.”

Feferi nodded in agreement. “Oh! You never got to open your present!”

“Of course. Can’t forget that.” Eridan grabbed the gift that got pushed to the side as their meals had come.

As he pulled out the tissue paper from the back, Feferi spoke. “I know how much you like scarves so I watched a few videos online and taught myself how to knit. I understand if you think that it’s ugly or ridiculous, but I spent a lot of time working on it.”

Eridan gently pulled the package out of the bag. “Fef, you… you made this?” In his hands was a long striped blue scarf.

“Mhmm. It’s the first scarf I’ve ever knitted, though, so it’s a bit messy.”

“It’s beautiful.” Eridan tugged off the scarf he currently wore and quickly replaced it with the one Fef made with the care and love of her own two hands. “Thank you, Fef. I love it.”

“I’m glad you like it. You do look quite handsome in it.”

“But Fef, I always look handsome.” Eridan joked.

“And he’s modest too.” Fef giggled.

It wasn’t long before the waiter arrived with the check. Eridan quickly handed him his credit card, not even bothering to look at the amount of money he was spending. The waiter thanked him and went to run his card.

“How much was it?” Fef asked nervously.

“Don’t know. Don’t care.” Eridan shrugged. “That card has more money on it than probably everyone in the room aside from you so I’m not too worried about it. I just prefer to think of this as a priceless night.”

“Eridan, you can’t just go spending haphazardly. That’s how people get in trouble.”

He sighed. “Fef, I know that. But tonight is special. It’s our anniversary and the day after you announced your candidacy. We deserve a night free from worry.”

“I’ll let this one slide, I guess. But in the future, be more careful.”

“Don’t worry.” Eridan smiled. “I will.”

The waiter came back with his card. Fortunately, there was nothing else to sign. This place discouraged tips so he didn’t have too look at a price to figure out percentages. “I hope you have a wonderful rest of the night, Miss Peixes. It has been a marvelous experience serving you.” The waiter bowed and said his goodbyes.

“Are you ready yet?” Eridan asked.

Feferi nodded. “Yes. I can’t wait to get back home.”

That brought a smile to Eridan’s lips. “Neither can I.”

They picked up what little they had brought with them, making sure none of the wrapping from the gifts was left on the table. Confident that they had every thing, they headed out of the restaurant.   

Traffic had died down since the busy rush hour had passed. The fact that he wasn’t in a hurry to get anywhere also made the drive much more bearable.  He and Fef chatted a bit on the way back about random things throughout the night to fill in the time while Eridan drove. They soon got back to Feferi’s apartment and Eridan parked in the parking garage.

Eridan walked Fef up to her apartment. They stopped right in front of her door and Eridan leaned in to give her a hug. “I had a wonderful night Fef.”

She clinged on to him and Eridan could feel her smirk against his shoulder. “You know it doesn’t have to end now.”

Eridan had been hoping she would say something like that. “I’ll stay for as long as you want me around.” He tilted his head back a little so he could look at her. “You really are the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. How did I ever become so lucky to end up with you?”

“The same reason I ended up with a handsome, trustworthy man who believes in me.” She reached over and combed her fingers through his hair. “I love you, Eridan.”

“Love you too Fef.”

They met for a deep kiss, each tightly wrapping their arms around each other. Eridan held her as if she was the most precious thing in the world. He never wanted to let her go. She was more important than air.

They temporarily broke apart long enough for Fef to unlock her door. It wasn’t long before they were back at it (and each other), though, soon finding themselves in the bedroom.

Eridan went to sleep that night thinking nothing in his life could possibly go wrong.      

 

 

 

 


End file.
